Four-year-old Behavior Explained

I imagine that there is a President of the Four-year-olds and it is their job to make sure all the four-year-olds on the planet are meeting their naughty quotas.

This is how I think it works. On January 31, the President receives a print off of the naughtyness of every four-year-old. The naughtyness would be then given a percentage based on but not limited to these criteria: not listening to parents, whining, destructiveness, public embarrassment, the non-eating of mealtime foods, how wet they can get the bathroom during bath time, and the prolonging of bed/nap times. 

Their goal is to reach 75% naughtyness during a month. They can not have higher than that because four-year-olds are smart. They realize that they can't be naughty 100% of the time or they would never get to go anywhere or do anything. They must be good at least part of the time. They are smart in the ways of achieving this as well. They will hug a sibling in front of you or help them play toys. They will do a voluntary pickup of toys. They will tell you cute stories and jokes all in hopes to get on your good side.

Within the first week of the new month, they all receive their percentages from the previous month. If they haven't reached 75% naughtyness, they are given tips and tricks to help them reach the current months goals. This will result in a peak in naughty behavior. All sweetness and helpfulness leave the building. Siblings get hit and blamed for making messes. Destructiveness and lack of listening increase.

Naughty behavior will start to level out mid-month once they know they have met that months goals and your sweet little angel returns.

I have to believe this is factual. Otherwise, how in the world is the current behavior of my four-year-old explained?  Where did the Avery of just a week ago go and when will she back? Maybe the nap being had an hour early will lead to a happier, nicer, and a listening four-year-old. Let's all hope.